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when your past memories come to the surface,
thats when the rage emerges
it becomes so hard to control the urges,
the zest is gone and the only thing you want is vengeance

it becomes a fire within

like a candle the stronger the fire the faster you melt,
like a castle the stronger the walls the more isolated you felt

no matter how much you weep no one understands
the innocent child who craved for love, there she still stands
she tried to escape the reality by going to the dreamlands
she is still the same now, nothing changes,
the only thing that's changed is the ages
i'm still a child in an adult's body

i have a lost child within
it feels so dark and lost beneath my skin
my heart is underused, it is rotten
because the fact that i have it, is forgotten
people did spit on it, kick it, devalue it
like an abandoned shack
but it's not because the way i act
they just hated me for existing
now there's something in me that is missing
and i don't even know what it is
and who i am anymore

lack of love makes my heart bleed
i sometimes want all of the love that exists to fill the hole
i sometimes mold my identity to feel more desired and whole
i don't know if it's out of need or greed
the only thing i know is i will never be freed
from the loneliness

i have no power to accept defeat
i am ambitious, so within me there is heat
i know where my fear lies
but i don't want to accept it, so i kill it and a part of me dies
with time everything subsides
i hope

the strongest weapon of a weak person is denial
if i stop denying you will soon attend to my burial
it's like the last bullet left
just milimeters away
from rope

or else i'll be consumed by my guilt
im prone to it, just the way i've been built

no farewells left to bid
i've already lost everything

but im used to it so it doesn't matter
it never got better
i was born to suffer
and im just doing my part